This next sentence will read as stupid as it sounds but, it’s incredible how perception can literally ‘change’ the way you see things.
I know what perception means, given my disclaimer, but wow, has this last week not shown me!
Monday I discovered I was no longer in possession of my ID, credit card and bank card. It’s admin beyond admin to sort this out – I’m STILL trying. I almost fell apart, from feeling overwhelmed and predominantly sorry for myself. I was broke, everyone I know was broke, and the banking system was just for shyte!
But Monday evening I spent a wonderful time chatting and catching up with a friend.
Friday I planned a get together with a couple of friends I hadn’t seen for a while and I’d missed, but one friend in particular couldn’t make it. I was hurt because it was a plan I made in good time, and I felt like as the week progressed I was relegated to a lower spot in her list until I didn’t feature at all.
But I had a wonderful night out with old and new friends.
Saturday was more bank grief and cleaning. This again brought up feelings of resentment. My finances were shitty, my apartment was nothing near where I would have liked it to be, and it seemed like my misfortune was never ending.
But I finished my night with one of the deepest and most honest conversations I’ve had in a while.
Sunday was an adventure of note trying to get to my performance at the Barnyard Theatre. I felt sad because I believe I was let down – and also by the fact that I see no way out of my need to rely on others for help. My mother is always saying there nothing wrong with this, but it bugged me how it felt like it always me who needed help and I couldn’t in turn be the one who offered help.
But I sang.
So what if I lost my cards, or I live in a crappy place, or I have no real money to speak of, or I’m not the center of someone’s attention 24/7. I had a few GOOD moments- and if I wasn’t so preoccupied with the negative, I’d realize that those ‘good’ moments were actually freakin’ GREAT!
Signing off, I’d like to say, take a minute just reflecting. Then focus on the good things – it really does work wonders on how you perceive your life!
I know what perception means, given my disclaimer, but wow, has this last week not shown me!
Monday I discovered I was no longer in possession of my ID, credit card and bank card. It’s admin beyond admin to sort this out – I’m STILL trying. I almost fell apart, from feeling overwhelmed and predominantly sorry for myself. I was broke, everyone I know was broke, and the banking system was just for shyte!
But Monday evening I spent a wonderful time chatting and catching up with a friend.
Friday I planned a get together with a couple of friends I hadn’t seen for a while and I’d missed, but one friend in particular couldn’t make it. I was hurt because it was a plan I made in good time, and I felt like as the week progressed I was relegated to a lower spot in her list until I didn’t feature at all.
But I had a wonderful night out with old and new friends.
Saturday was more bank grief and cleaning. This again brought up feelings of resentment. My finances were shitty, my apartment was nothing near where I would have liked it to be, and it seemed like my misfortune was never ending.
But I finished my night with one of the deepest and most honest conversations I’ve had in a while.
Sunday was an adventure of note trying to get to my performance at the Barnyard Theatre. I felt sad because I believe I was let down – and also by the fact that I see no way out of my need to rely on others for help. My mother is always saying there nothing wrong with this, but it bugged me how it felt like it always me who needed help and I couldn’t in turn be the one who offered help.
But I sang.
So what if I lost my cards, or I live in a crappy place, or I have no real money to speak of, or I’m not the center of someone’s attention 24/7. I had a few GOOD moments- and if I wasn’t so preoccupied with the negative, I’d realize that those ‘good’ moments were actually freakin’ GREAT!
Signing off, I’d like to say, take a minute just reflecting. Then focus on the good things – it really does work wonders on how you perceive your life!
