OK, so I haven’t been to the gym in a minute… but I have my reasons. Next week I’ll be treadmilling like a demon that’s how on it is!
But I digress.
In my sadly sincere effort to evade exercise – I dropped my ‘quest for fabulosity’ ball. The weight losing was a plan to achieve overall fabulousness and ultimate hotness but I was so unmotivated I couldn’t even climb the stairs to my flat… eek.
Side note: People get really offended when you take the elevator up to the first floor. They practically froth at the mouth and bay for your blood when you take the elevator down. I’m like, if you’re so fit… why don’t you traipse up the five flights to your hovel mmmh? I look like I can hardly manage rolling around on level ground never mind climbing… anything! Leave me and my elevator-taking fat self alone!
Inhale. Exhale. Let’s talk about something else…
As I was saying, my weight loss was a long term goal, I needed an instant boost. You know, that certain something guaranteed to add a little sparkle to your person. That something that makes you step with pizzazz and ‘errythang ain’t nothin’ but a chicken wing’ – you could even lose your job and it wouldn’t matter… why? Cause you look fly! (OK, perhaps losing your job would depress you, but you know the feeling I’m trying to invoke).
For me, that something is makeup! It’s silly because I’m not a girlie-girl per say, but I go ape for that ish! Trust. There’s nothing like the perfect concealer-base-bronzer-blush combo. And for me the pièce de résistance… FALSE EYELASHES!
I suffer a genetic predisposition of nonexistent lashes so when I put on a set of fake ones… I am transformed! But you’d think I’d had a face transplant with the response I received. Complements, but sheesh… it makes me wonder what people thought of me before.
More importantly what message was I putting out if people gawk at my lashed up makeover… one guy even commented on my ‘barbie-eye get up’ – Accusation? Complement? I don’t know… but like I said I looked fly!
They say the eyes are the windows of the soul… then eyelashes must be the curtains. But goodness, what have my curtains been saying about my soul… all this time! I shudder to think. Now I know my tray of faux lashes are probably deluxe floor to ceiling upgrades from the shabby plastic blinds G*d gave me – and I’m liking the spirit of trying and embracing new things.
So, being a D.I.T – Diva in Training, I will lash away – individual ones too!
At least I know I clean up real nice :)
But I digress.
In my sadly sincere effort to evade exercise – I dropped my ‘quest for fabulosity’ ball. The weight losing was a plan to achieve overall fabulousness and ultimate hotness but I was so unmotivated I couldn’t even climb the stairs to my flat… eek.
Side note: People get really offended when you take the elevator up to the first floor. They practically froth at the mouth and bay for your blood when you take the elevator down. I’m like, if you’re so fit… why don’t you traipse up the five flights to your hovel mmmh? I look like I can hardly manage rolling around on level ground never mind climbing… anything! Leave me and my elevator-taking fat self alone!
Inhale. Exhale. Let’s talk about something else…
As I was saying, my weight loss was a long term goal, I needed an instant boost. You know, that certain something guaranteed to add a little sparkle to your person. That something that makes you step with pizzazz and ‘errythang ain’t nothin’ but a chicken wing’ – you could even lose your job and it wouldn’t matter… why? Cause you look fly! (OK, perhaps losing your job would depress you, but you know the feeling I’m trying to invoke).
For me, that something is makeup! It’s silly because I’m not a girlie-girl per say, but I go ape for that ish! Trust. There’s nothing like the perfect concealer-base-bronzer-blush combo. And for me the pièce de résistance… FALSE EYELASHES!
I suffer a genetic predisposition of nonexistent lashes so when I put on a set of fake ones… I am transformed! But you’d think I’d had a face transplant with the response I received. Complements, but sheesh… it makes me wonder what people thought of me before.
More importantly what message was I putting out if people gawk at my lashed up makeover… one guy even commented on my ‘barbie-eye get up’ – Accusation? Complement? I don’t know… but like I said I looked fly!
They say the eyes are the windows of the soul… then eyelashes must be the curtains. But goodness, what have my curtains been saying about my soul… all this time! I shudder to think. Now I know my tray of faux lashes are probably deluxe floor to ceiling upgrades from the shabby plastic blinds G*d gave me – and I’m liking the spirit of trying and embracing new things.
So, being a D.I.T – Diva in Training, I will lash away – individual ones too!
At least I know I clean up real nice :)
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